The Five Worst Contracts on the Detroit Tigers

I was going to write my first (and possibly last) article for After the Buzzer about how to fix the 2008 Detroit Tigers. I figured that I couldn’t possibly do it without it turning into an angry, profanity laced rant about how I enjoyed watching 2003 Tigers more than I have enjoyed this team so far this season. With that team at least I knew before I started watching they were going to lose, so I could just sit back and enjoy the immortal Dmitri Young lethargically jogging after fly balls. Instead I’ll look ahead a bit to the contracts that will give us headaches now, and for many years to come.

Gary Sheffield
2008:$14M, 2009:$14M
This one is by far the worst of this group. Sheffield was acquired in the off-season following the Tigers improbable run to the World Series in 2006. He is a former Florida Marlin, which seems to be a requirement for any player General Manager Dave Dombrowski trades for. Be worried if Dombrowski picks up former Marlins reliever Antonio Alfonseca to shore up their inept bullpen. Probably better known for his extra digit, than anything he accomplished in his moderately productive career. I’m not sure if Tigers ownership would be willing to buy him out of his contract with Barnum and Bailey. Back to the rant on Sheffield. The Tigers offensive woes in 2008 can be directly linked to Gary Sheffield hitting third in the lineup, with an average hovering around .190. How is it a good idea to bat Miguel Cabrera in the five spot? Does Jim Leyland think batting the players in this order optimizes run production or is he afraid that Gary Sheffield’s ego can’t take the hit of batting anywhere but the best spot in the lineup? The only solution I see is trading Sheffield for Dmitri Young. At least Dmitri won’t clog up the DH spot and we can have the added adventure of watching him aimlessly roam the outfield.

Brandon Inge
2008:$6.2M, 2009:$6.3M, 2010:$6.6M
Oops. Inge signed an extension prior to the 2007 season, but has been replaced at third base by Miguel Cabrera, making him baseball’s most expensive utility player. Once was probably one of the more popular answers to the Who’s Your Tiger ad campaign, now seems to have caused more than a few fans to sour on him since he began whining about playing any position that isn’t third base. Going back to catcher would seem to make the most sense being that Pudge Rodriquez’s contract is up at the end of the season and the Tigers have no viable options coming up through their farm system to replace him.(I sincerely hope nobody is saying “Well what about Vance Wilson?”) Inge claims that catching hurts his offensive production. In 2006, his first season playing exclusively third base he hit .253/.313/.463, which is passable considering his stellar defense at the hot corner. But last season he dropped his averages to .236/.312/.376. I’m going to subscribe to the there’s nowhere to go but up theory.

Kenny Rogers
2008:$8M
I don’t know if my opinion of a player has ever done as much of a 180 as it has with The Gambler. The camera incident moved him into the company of guys such as Stephen Jackson, Roger Clemens, and Claude Lemieux as some of my most disliked athletes out there. I was less than ecstatic when the Tigers signed him prior to the 2006 season. But after an all star regular season, he faced the Yankees in game 3 of the ALDS in 2006 and basically decided that there was no way in hell he was losing even if it meant cheating… allegedly. That season he was worth the eight million bucks that the Tigers shelled out for him. Last year when he pitched a total of 63 innings, he was not. This season, when he becomes eligible for the senior discount at Old Country Buffet, he isn’t.

Pudge Rodriguez
2008:$13M
Another former Florida Marlin. The signing of Pudge in 2004 was the first in a series of moves that made them the team that they are today. This gave Detroit credibility again after one of the worst seasons in the history of baseball. Things like leadership and handling the pitching staff cannot be measured. Things like hitting and throwing out base runners can. He has steadily declined in these categories over the last three seasons. While elite catchers are very hard to come by, Pudge is most certainly not worth 13 million dollars, even by today’s standards.

Nate Robertson
2008:$4.25M, 2009:$7M, 2010:$10M
Don’t get me wrong, I like Nate Robertson. He wears athletic glasses, works his ass off, and started the gum time phenomenon. Speaking of gum time, where the hell has that gone? Shoving an entire package of Big League Chew into your mouth is a hell of a lot more fun than turning my hat inside out and attempting to balance it on my head. Why has nobody figured out that the reason the Tigers haven’t been good in the last year and a half is directly linked to dugout BLC consumption? My thought is that mediocre prospects like Armando Galarraga, Virgil Vasquez, and Jordan Tata could fill the fifth spot in the rotation with an ERA around five just as well as Nate Robertson will be able too. I know for sure they could do it for less money, and I bet, with time and practice, they could learn to chew a whole pack of Big League too.